Monday, June 8, 2009

The Five Continuing Conversations of Long Term Reationships -- Part 3 -- Finances

Money is one of the two biggest causes of fights in a marriage that can lead to divorce. Most couples have no common understanding of financial planning or philosophy. Agreement is critical on this issue.

1. Debt -- you should agree not to have any, but the reason you should have this conversation before you get married is -- if you are committed to being a Dave Ramsey -- "live like no one else so you can live like no one else" -- person and you future spouse is not -- YOU ARE GOING TO FIGHT. It will happen. Better convince the other person to be debt free before you tie the knot or it will be a problem.

2. Budgeting -- If you want to know what a person feels is important look at where they spend their money. Give the person you love a test question -- "If you had X dollars how would you spend it" will tell you a lot -- toys or future, poverty mind or prosperity mind. It will tell you if a person is responsible with money or a person who does not really care.

3. Work -- Career choices are important and both sides should be respected. If one person wants to stay near home and the other want to work abroad their could be a problem. Finding s way to mess your occupations and career aspirations is lifelong process that requires changes on a regular basis.

Once your married, the conversations continue because the financial situation of a couple is constantly changing. Get a plan and stick to it but don't be afraid to change the tactics as this situation changes.

Next -- In Laws

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