There is one supreme difficulty in saying polygamy is not Biblical -- so many heroes of the faith were in polygamist relationships: Abraham, Jacob, Caleb, David, Solomon, for the guys along with many others. Sarah, Leah, Hannah, Abigail for the girls along with others. Fact is multiple wives with one guy is quite common in the Old Testament.
The New Testament is completely silent other than the mention by Paul that church officers should be the husband of one wife. The fact is in the ideal of the New Testament both in the teaching of Christ and Paul is one man and one woman for life. However, polygamy is never condemned in either Testament.
The best we can say is that the Bible does not promote or condemn polygamy but holds up monogamy as the ideal standard. Nothing is said about one woman with multiple guys but then again it does not appear at all in Scripture -- prohibition by silence? The issue back then is parentage and when a woman has a child there is no doubt who the mother is but the father can only be verified by the husband being the only guy to 'know' his wife.
Bible aside, are there any good reasons for polygamy, Let's list the pros and cons.
Pro: Defence Against Infertility: in fact this seems to be one of the reasons it was allowed in the society of Abraham and Sarah because in the case of infertility the man had a second option to produce and heir. Today we have a lot of science to do this kind of thing be even that does not always work. If there is the option to do like Sarah did, would some couples take it today? They might because not everyone is comfort able with the unknown donor or adoption.
Con: Spousal Rivalry: Not every biblical account has this but many do: Sarah/Hagar, Leah/Rachel, Hannah/Peninnah are but three notable examples. There are some cases however of of seemingly peaceful polygamy, even in the present day. Can happen but also could be absent.
Pro: Women taken care of in Later Life: Much as I hate to say it this one isn't mine, but a woman I talked to, who was elderly, once told me that she would not mind having to share a husband because having a man around part of the time was better than having no man at all and the loneliness that goes with it. Given that women outlive men this is what happens most of the time. She cited being taken care of and occasional companionship as reasons.
Con: Woman Used As Property: In many places around the world this is the case with polygamy, it is basically another asset to the men to have multiple wives but none of them are loved just used. Would that be the case in freely entered into polygamy? Well, doesn't abuse exist in monogamy too. Either way this does not help and maybe having more than one wife would soften some men. Also with more than one woman, abuse might not go unreported as much. The truth is that even though abuse is often expected both toward women and and children in polygamist relationships, it is actually rarer than in monogamous ones.
Pro: Another Option Instead of Being an Unwed Mother: The standard sad story is boy meets girl, girl and boy have sex, girl gets pregnant, boy feels trapped, boy takes off leaving girl alone. Polygamy might eliminate the 'boy feels trapped' part and thus the girl left alone. Biblically, the guy is obligated to marry the girl and provide for her and her children, also however, if he works hard and can afford it he could take another wife later. Double motivation? As a Variant to this -- Polygamy as an option to divorce.
Con: Complicated Family History: "Yeah this is my oldest son by my third wife" comes to mind. One thing though is that the kids would have two parents in stead of one but the legalities of this are going to get complicated.
Pro: Shared Motherly Resources: This is another one from a woman. Wouldn't it be nice to take turns watching the children and taking care of them. One breastfeeding mother said it would also be nice to have more than her small breasts to feed her child. One wife acting as wet nurse so to speak. Additionally, in our career minded world -- one woman works and the other does child care. Or you could alternate working and child care with three jobs. The possibilities get long as long as you have a group of wives who work together well.
Con: Not the Ideal: Polygamy is not ideal Biblically. In the end it becomes a state where the love Christ has for a church (which is supposed to be reflected in marriage) really does not exist.
In America this notion of polygamy is gaining popularity and a lot of the reasons I gave above are from a simple 'legalized polygamy" search. Lots of hits, so if you are look for more pros and cons just do that search yourself.
Can I make a call about it as a theologian. The Christian should aim at faithful monogamy as the ideal, but a can see no way to preach or teach against polygamy. To each their own, but the most practical thing I can say is -- Can You Really Handle Two or More Women? No Thanks.
Next: Legalized Prostitution (yeah, I thought of another one)
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