Christians and Sexuality: Masturbation

Hey, I bet I have everyone's attention. Want to know how I know that? Because when I was a kid statistics showed at the time that 90% of men and 50% of women masturbated on a regular basis. Want to know what it is now? -- 95% of men and, hold your breath, 70% of women now masturbate on a regular basis. (Guess sexual education does increase some numbers or at least gets more open stats on the subject). That's roughly 80 to 85% of the human population of the USA.

Now for the Christian part -- want to know how much difference being a Christian makes on the stats? -- very little. It's like a friend of mine used to say -- 'when it comes to masturbation, there are those that do and those that lie."

OK. Is it a sin? Good question. Many people have puzzled over the same thing. On one extreme, you have those who think it is the worst sin ever. On the other, it is no worse than head scratching. There are of course many views in between.

There is no direct statement in Scripture that says: 'Masturbation is a sin" so that's out. Fact is, unless there is excessive use of masturbation, nothing wrong will happen as far as consequences. Most sins have a physical or social downside. In moderation, masturbation does not have this and in fact can be healthy and normal.

There are two other Scriptures that might shed some light on the subject.

One I have heard used is Genesis 38:7-10: "Now Judah took a wife for Er his firstborn, and her name was Tamar. But Er, Judah's firstborn, was evil in the sight of the LORD, so the LORD took his life. Then Judah said to Onan, "Go in to your brother's wife, and perform your duty as a brother-in-law to her, and raise up offspring for your brother." Onan knew that the offspring would not be his; so when he went in to his brother's wife, he wasted his seed on the ground in order not to give offspring to his brother. But what he did was displeasing in the sight of the LORD; so He took his life also."

One preacher I heard said this was masturbation. Unfortunately there is an alternative explanation. It could be coitus interruptus; that is, Onan went into Tamar and had sex with her but took himself out before he ejaculated and spilled his seed on the ground. Kind of makes him even more despicable doesn't it? What we need to remember is these people slept on the ground in tents. Also, what displeased the Lord here exactly? It was the fact Onan didn't raise up seed to his brother, not that he spilt his seed on the ground. At best, this passage sets precedent for the Laws Moses would write about keeping inheritance in the family.

The other passage is of course Matthew 5:27-28 -- "You have heard that it was said, 'YOU SHALL NOT COMMIT ADULTERY'; but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. "

This one actually gives a Christian more trouble because if lust is indeed involved then sin is there and masturbation often involves lust. But does it always? If lust is involved, that lust is sin but what about the act of masturbation itself. Because we have no clear text we have to conclude it is not a sin in and of itself, but it is an action that could lead to sin either through lust or addiction. Use of porn is automatically disqualified because of the lust factor and bringing in people you are not married to.

Let me present a few cases, I am not trying to be gross here, I am just trying to examine the subject objectively:

1. A married woman on a business trip is feeling lonely and missing her husband, She goes back to her room and fantasizes about her husband and masturbates -- did she sin? (By the way; this is an actual situation I got asked about in a counseling session once.)

2. A young man fantasizes about his wedding night using a completely non-existent fantasy girl (no porn use; all in his head) and masturbates -- did he sin?

3. Inside marriage a couple engages in mutual masturbation as part of foreplay -- sin? Same couple does the same thing using phone sex because they are separated by distance -- sin?

4. A single person masturbates because it is either that or fornication with their girlfriend/boyfriend. They use it to keep sexual pressure down and avoid actual sexual intercourse. Sin?

These situations make the subject of masturbation more complicated and I would have to say that it is because of these things I classify masturbation as a matter of conscience. Why? Because, in some cases masturbation might remind someone of their former lifestyle before Christ. In that case, they should try to abstain. But on the flip side, some of the above situations do not seem sinful to me. Matter of conscience? I think so. It may be a matter of weighing the situation and asking "is this lust or something else?"